Even funnier is that often 0.25mg or 0.5mg is closer to the correct dose, and those sizes tend to be hard to find.
There actually is a condition that calls for extremely high (100mg+ doses), but it is a very rare thing, no one should ever consider that much without instruction from a doctor. But you'll find it right next to the normal <=5mg doses without any explanation.
The Natrol liquid isn't usually too hard to track down. They advertise it as 1 mg or 2.5 mg, but it's the same stuff, the bottle just direct you to take 4 or 10 mL respectively.
I really like the metaphor of consciousness as a drop separated from the ocean during bodily life and returning to it (merging with it) after death. (This is what my strongest bufo/5-meo-dmt experiences showed me, but I guess one can't really say if the idea created that or the other way)
- If a drop separated from the ocean and returns to the ocean, is it not still existing in the ocean?
- Are you fully identified with memories? What if you had a head wound and forget your past- are you still yourself?
- After the drop is given back the ocean, is it possible that a new drop will become separated and hold all the same properties as the first droplet (minus its specific history/memory)?
Fwiw having drank ayahuasca hundreds of times, I've never seen elves (have seen plenty of other weird stuff though). Only times have been with breakthrough doses of smoked dmt. I guarantee it doesn't make it any less/more valid. There are so many more profound things to see, I don't know why people get so hung up on elves lol (if you ever experience meeting the medicine of a master plant/tree spirt during a traditional dieta you'd be flabbergasted).
I have some earnest questions, and please take it in that spirit, though I realize these might easily be interpreted as being negative.
To disclose, I've done LSD probably 15 times and 4-ACO-DMT three or four times. I haven't done it in years and I'm OK if I never do them again. LSD no longer hits the same way it used to such that the unpleasant parts now far outweigh the good parts.
Getting back to my questions, I've been under the understanding that ayahuasca can be punishing (vomiting, scary trips) but people often find it was worth it due to the insights they gain in the process. After the first handful of trips, are you still finding out new things? Are you so familiar with the terrifying aspects that they are no longer terrifying? Or are you lucky that the good aspects are still worth the price of admission? Is the driver for you insights or just the novel experiences which arise?
My wife's therapist went on an ayahuasca retreat and said it was like going through a wringer emotionally but it was really worth it. It had me wondering if maybe I should try it. A year later the therapist did it again and said it was like going through a ringer every night for four nights and she got nothing from it. :-(
I'm a bit of a different case, have been volunteering/working at retreat centers in Peru and Mexico for the last 6 years (and am somewhat of an apprentice in a particular tradition).
There are tough parts physically sure, you mostly get used to those parts, sometimes I'll have long stretches of not vomiting and sometimes it'll be every (or multiple times per) ceremony.
As far as "finding out new things", we often use this analogy of layers of an onion (of which you tend to cry more with each layer coming off :)). Breaks between sessions to integrate are needed- after a retreat you might find that some of your baselines have shifted, and you need to find your new normal (or make changes in your life to break out of the old patterns you didn't realize you were stuck in because it was just normal/programmed and not a choice previously). After you've adjusted/integrated other things may begin to surface that were just overshadowed by the energies you've cleaned up before. (A good shaman has cleaned themself to the point that their own energies no longer dominate their vision, and they can "see" outside themselves to diagnose/heal others). Anyways sometimes the physical side effects are just too much for some people and it's understandably not the modality for them...if you spend your ceremonies being entirely consumed by those effects, you can still make progress drinking with a good shaman (though it might be a few ceremonies before you get your head above water).
I still get surprised (especially with master plant diets). Ayahuasca isn't addictive but I think for some of us there is an intellectual addiction to it. The scary ones are the ones I look forward to now :).
I'm very biased but I'd only recommend doing retreats that offer master plant diets in a traditional Shipibo context if you're looking to make lasting changes. The master plants (adjunct plants taken alongside ayahuasca) offer a whole other dimension that ayahuasca alone doesn't even scratch the surface of. A weekend retreat in someone's garage might be ok for a "tuneup" or to see where you're at once in a while, but it's not the place for deep work or for someone new imo (and you risk opening a box that you won't have time to wrap your head around).
Usually when people just say DMT they mean nn-DMT (which is a lot more visual/weird and can bring on the "elves" at breakthrough dosage). 5-meo-dmt(/bufo) is much more of a felt thing, but can definitely have some visual effects (I usually get enveloped in the bright white light of god before dissolving into everything/nothing, ymmv).
None at all, if you're setting them up correctly. 100-150 nits (cd/m²) is just about right. I color-calibrate my monitors and this is one step in the flow. I calibrate to 120 nits and find that it's consistently about 33% brightness. Calibrating this way, I can look at a full white screen (think "blank notepad window") with no particular eyestrain.
My issue with running most monitors this dim is that colors look so much worse and contrast is lost. It’s not as much of a problem on my OLED phone though, which does tend toward the dimmer side. My desktop monitors (IPS) on the other hand are rarely below 50%.
I have never noticed that problem. But I always adjust brightness as part of a full color calibration, with ICC profile and everything, which probably makes a difference.
I will say that it took a bit to adjust to the first time I did it, but now it's painful to use any monitor at "full" 200+ nit brightness.
When I went from BlackBerry to Android (Samsung), I noticed the Android was much dimmer, though BlackBerry devices had gotten brighter. My experience is from 8700c through 9900 Bold.
If we were smart we'd use AI to grok a system in order to help us reduce its complexity. I don't think we're anywhere close to even being able to provide all the necessary context to solve problems like this.
That is not the only effect of scopolamine. It's a very potent deliriant. In Colombia it has been used by attackers (referred to as "devil's breath", blown into the face) to cause amnesia and a very docile state (a victim might be walked to an ATM, forced to empty their accounts, and not remember a thing. Or worse). It can cause some extreme types of hallucinations.
> referred to as "devil's breath", blown into the face
I've read similar reports in email chains in the 2000. Like the guy that touched a piece of paper and a few seconds later collapsed. I think that some local newspaper even published it, without evidence.
From the NYT article:
> She carried it from a restaurant counter to their table.
He had two spoonfuls, Mr. Valdez, 31, said. “And that’s the last thing I remember.”
> He drank a pink soda, he said in a video, and later awoke to find his wallet and phone gone.
> One 42-year-old man from New York recalled being drugged by a Tinder date who served him a rum and coke that he said knocked him out for 24 hours.
These case makes more sense. There are a few recent similar cases here, and many buildings have security cameras on the front door, so they get a nice video of the escaping thieves.
Yah I think there's a lot of urban legend around the stuff. I know a few people who have used it (well, Brugmansia plants that contain it anyways) as part of their apprenticeships (Amazonian plant medicine, in conjunction with ayahuasca) in a more controlled manner and even then they have some wild stories about it (waking up naked in the jungle, covered in scratches with no memory etc). It lasts a looong time.
There actually is a condition that calls for extremely high (100mg+ doses), but it is a very rare thing, no one should ever consider that much without instruction from a doctor. But you'll find it right next to the normal <=5mg doses without any explanation.
reply